Monday, July 16, 2018

Admitting our differences

"Not everyone thinks the way you think, 
knows the things you know, 
believes what you believe, 
nor acts as you would act. 
Remember this and you will go a long way 
in getting along with others." 
~Arthur Forman

Coco and Remy: Getting along -- most of the time / Cindy La Ferle

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Sunday, July 15, 2018

Time to lighten up

"Mix a little foolishness with your most serious plans. 
It is wise to be silly at the right moment." 
~Horace

Cindy La Ferle

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Friday, July 13, 2018

Summer days in northern Michigan

“Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes 
on the grass under the trees on a summer’s day, 
listening to the murmur of water, 
or watching the clouds float across the sky 
is by no means a waste of time.” 
~John Lubbock



Empire Bluffs / Cindy La Ferle 

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Thursday, July 12, 2018

The gift of sensitivity

"People who tell you you're 'too sensitive' 
don't want to be held responsible 
for your reaction when they hurt or mistreat you." 
~Anonymous quote found on Pinterest

Cindy La Ferle


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Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Standing out

“If knowing yourself and being yourself were as easy to do as to talk about, there wouldn't be nearly so many people walking around in borrowed postures, spouting secondhand ideas, trying desperately to fit in rather than to stand out.” 
 Warren G. Bennis, On Becoming a Leader


Larkspur at the Cotswold Cottage, Greenfield Village  / Cindy La Ferle



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Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Happy people

"Happy people accept responsibility for how their lives unfold. 
They believe their happiness is a byproduct of 
their own thinking, beliefs, attitudes, character and behavior." 
~Marc & Angel Hack Life


Cindy La Ferle

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Sunday, July 8, 2018

How to have a real conversation

"You can make more friends in two months 
by becoming interested in other people 
than you can in two years by trying 
to get other people interested in you."
~Dale Carnegie


Old Friends  / Cindy La Ferle


At a local pub recently, my husband and I discussed "the lost art of conversation" with a couple of our closest friends -- the sort of friends with whom we can talk about anything.  

We all puzzled over the fact that, lately, we meet way too many people who chatter about themselves and their own lives -- nonstop -- without expressing much interest in the other folks who are listening. In other words, a lot of us are talking at each other, rather than with each other.

What the heck is going on? One theory is that social media sites encourage one-sided communication, and we've gotten used to delivering monologues and self-promoting tidbits. As technology experts and psychologists point out, these sites are specifically designed to hook us on the rush of dopamine we get each time someone "likes" or comments on the posts we've shared. Furthermore, we're also addicted to instant gratification: We can share news and photos without waiting to see anyone in person.  


On the other hand, genuine conversation is a balanced exchange requiring patience, empathy, and listening skills. A good conversation is not a recital in which one person drones on about herself while the other person nods and applauds. A good conversation leaves everyone feeling heard, understood, and appreciated.  

The give-and-take of good talk

Good conversationalists make socializing a pleasure -- and if you're lucky, you already know a few of them. Here's what they do: 


1) Good conversationalists share details about their lives -- but they always find a way to loop the conversation back to you. For instance, they'll tell you about their glorious trip to New England -- but they'll be sure to ask what you've been doing with your free time this summer, too. 

2) Good conversationalists try to learn something new about every person they talk with -- even their old friends. They'll ask you for an update on how things have been going with your work, a project, your family. They remember that everyone has a vocation or an area of expertise, whether it's gardening, scuba diving, cooking, golf, fashion photography, or pet sitting. 


3) When they're at a loss for new conversation topics, they'll resort to books, movies, sports, or TV series. They'll ask you for movie or book recommendations; they'll ask which team you're cheering for; they'll ask about the cool shoes you're wearing. 


4) Good conversationalists avoid showing off -- because they know most people are turned off by anyone who tries too hard to impress. When they're tempted to brag or boast, they always question their own motives. If they think you'd be sincerely interested in their latest accomplishments, they'll share them only in the appropriate context. 


5) Good conversationalists pay unselfish attention to what the other person is saying. They don't simply wait until it's their turn to insert an opinion. They know that listening carefully opens a window to understanding others, and is an opportunity to learn something new. No wonder others seek out their company.

~Cindy La Ferle

Saturday, July 7, 2018

Creative living

"Everybody has a creative potential, 
and from the moment you can express 
this creative potential, you can start changing the world." 
~ Paulo Coelho


Cindy La Ferle

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Friday, July 6, 2018

Playing fair

"It’s tough but simple. 
You can’t play dirty and complain about the other side playing dirty. 
You can’t show disrespect and claim you’re being disrespected." 

~Mitch Albom

Greenfield Village / Cindy La Ferle

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